Wearing My Heart On My Sleeve

Opened Heart came to me during a time where I felt like I was losing everything. I have always been a person of many emotions and feelings, but I never knew how to let them out correctly. I responded by being angry and having a bad attitude and keeping to myself. Nobody could tell me anything, it was my way or no way. These past 2 -3 years have taught me not only how to express my emotions/feelings clearly, but that it is okay to be an emotional being. Now I say all of this to say, this blog is not meant to gossip or be messy, but instead it is to open minds to new conversations, to express opinions, and to be me. I want this to be a safe, loving, open, genuine, and graceful place for all.

In this life, we don't know what we are truly supposed to do, or what path we should follow. It took me a long time to really decide what I wanted to do with my life. I always loved writing, and creating different ways to express my words, but I also ask myself, "girl is this what you're supposed to be doing? God let me know if this isn't it" but instead of giving me a sign that this isn't for me, he continues to give me signs that it is. He puts new ideas in my mind and on my heart all the time. New ways to be me, more ways to be unique, new stories to write, new journeys to begin. The older I get the more I desire so much more for myself. Being able to be okay with who I am and what I am good at takes a while, but I'm glad I'm getting there. I am my biggest critic and also my biggest supporter. I stay in my head constantly overthinking and assuming no one sees me or how hard I work. One thing I have learned is that it is normal to overthink, or be fearful of the unknown, but you cannot stay there. Fear cannot hold you back from truly reaching your potential. Your mind and heart have to be bigger than your fear. No weapon formed against me shall ever prosper, those words live through me.

As a child I went through a lot more than I could imagine. I had to grow up faster than I probably should have, but I don't fault anyone for that; I just use my past experiences to shape me into a woman who is proud of myself. I never want to leave this earth knowing I didn't do something I had my heart set out on, so here I am. I always say when it's all said and done, I don't want to have any regrets or feel like I didn't live through my purpose and my own eyes. Nobody has the same vision or the same path and that is why it is so important to learn who you are, love who you are and be who you are, always.

I had a friend tell me that I do a lot and that she respects how I put myself out there. To be honest, she doesn’t even know how much that inspired me to write this today. I tend to believe my work goes unnoticed just because it doesn't reach a huge audience, but I am learning to understand that it reaches who it is supposed to reach. I inspire others without even knowing it and all it takes is a step outside of my box, get outside of my head and put my best foot forward. One of my favorite things to tell myself is that my growth and my comfort will never exist in the same room. If I had to pick which one I wanted more, I will be honest, I prefer to be comfortable. However, I believe being comfortable comes with being stagnant. That’s one thing I never want to be, so growth it is!

I want to create a space where no one is judged for what they say or how they feel. I have been seeing a lot of people say "everything isn't for the internet" or "people who spill their whole life on social media are seeking attention" I just don't agree. Sometimes people need an outlet, one that may come with empathy. Most of the time when you post on social media, someone is going to come with words of kindness; don't judge someone for seeking comfort and peace in a place you don't agree with. This blog is to let everyone know it is okay to be comfortable in your skin. To speak out against what you don't agree with. To embrace your own opinion because it is no better or worse than the next person. This blog will be real, it will open up conversations that need to be had. I hope that it inspires you to do what you love and be who you are with no judgement.

I deserve to express myself, and follow my dreams. I deserve to do the things I love without wondering what the next person will think. I deserve to write it out and express myself however I see fit. I appreciate my own process and mindset because without it I wouldn't be able to do half of the things that I aim to do. One thing I have learned in this journey of creativity is that the sky's the limit and I am the only one who can really get in my way. When you believe that you deserve it all, you'll get it all.

I truly hope you enjoy my blog and tune in for more. Opened Heart is going to be a safe space, a space given to people who aren't able to fully express themselves. Or who don't know where to start in their journey of self-love or passion. I cannot guarantee you it will be easy, but I know for a fact it will be worth it. Take some time for yourself.

The goal is to post a new blog every Sunday at 6:00pm. I want to eventually begin a forum called "Let's Talk About It", but I'll talk more about that further along. The more I do this, the more ideas I'll come up with, but in the mean time, thank you for taking this journey with me, for taking the time to read my words and understand that I am wearing my heart on my sleeve.

See you next time! Remember to stay safe, manifest whatever it is you want and be kind to yourself, hugs and kisses, Ki :)